How do u record your message in the phone?

Here is Mr Fantus recorded message while I dial him in his mobile:
Answering Machine Greeting:

"Hi. This is Mr Fantus
If you are the phone company, I already sent the money.
If you are my parents, please send money.
If you are my financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money.
If you are my friends, you owe me money.
If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money."

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